CRAVING HIS HATE

DEREK’S POV

If I was to describe my life, it’ll be one word....Cooked.

I knew it from the moment I clocked fifteen, and almost a decade later I still feel the same. I’m not one to believe in fairy tales now, but growing up I wished a genie would pop out of a kettle and grant me wishes.

I don’t know what the wish would have been, but the thought of it made me feel real fuzzy. Now that I think about it, I feel embarrassed that I had thoughts like that.

I stare out through the large glass walls and I let out a sigh.

The glass walls of the Judge Rank Biker Corporation executive suite didn’t offer a view; they offered a kingdom. From this height, the city looked like a circuit board, and I was the current meant to keep it running. I adjusted the cuff of my leather jacket, the high-grade hide catching the sterile office light. Most bikers in this country wore their grit on their sleeves, but at the Judge Rank Biker Corporation, we wore it with a corporate seal.

A frown decorates my face as the thought of what today would hold past my head. It’s about to be another chewing out from my father and the ridiculous things he expects from me.

I caught my reflection in the window. My blonde hair was buzzed tight, my grey eyes as cold as the steel of the custom chopper waiting in the garage downstairs. At twenty-four, I was the heir to an empire, the charismatic face of a legacy built on chrome and iron.

The silence in the room did nothing to help my already sour mood as I just wanted to get this conversation done and over with and be out of here before my teeth turns to powder.

I know I have the entire corporation in the palm of my hands and I can do whatever the fuck I want, But as I looked at the man sitting behind the mahogany desk—my father, George Kai—I felt less like a prince and more like a tool being recalibrated.

I became a tool the moment my Father realised it would be fun to toy with me and suddenly remembered he had a freewill. To be honest, I won’t be shocked if he gets off to this shit, he looks weirdly satiated when he riles me up.

“You’re distracted, Derek,” My father said, his voice a low gravel that still had the power to make my throat tight. I hate feeling nervous, it’s a trait of weakness and it makes me hate my skin for the entirety of the day. This is why I avoid seeing my Dad. The fact I only get to see him once and my entire week is ruined, is not something I’d like to pride myself in.

I hate the fact that his words get to me. I hate the fact that his voice is in my head every time I seal a document with my stamp. I shake my head willing the thoughts away.

I push my fists into my pockets as I try to hold my composure.

He didn’t look up from the ledger. Ever since my mother died, the only thing he cared about was the corporation’s bottom line and the sabotage of anyone who stood in his way.

“I’m ready for the conference, Father,” I replied, my tone smooth, practiced. I was the leader of the JRBC, a man who stopped at nothing to get what he wanted. What I wanted right now was the one thing he never gave: a nod of genuine approval.

All I wanted was just one proud look from him. But it never happened. To him, I was no different from the employee sitting at the back of his desk in the managing department. I was no different from the security guard down at the garage. I was just someone he could fire on the spot if he didn’t need my services.

This is the man that fucked my Mom and gave birth to me, I don’t see how he could see me any less than a son. But here we are

“Are you?” He finally looked up. His eyes were hard.

“Yes” My features harden as his eyes meet mine. His eyes filled with nothing but degradation and of course I’d have to match the energy he gives. “I have it all under control Father”

I will myself from rolling my eyes, getting annoyed by the fact that he decided not to do this himself.

“Let’s not forget you were supposed to go yourself, but-“

“I’d watch the next words that come out of my mouth if I were you Derek” His voice turned lethal as he slowly puts the ledger away and I nod to myself.

Finally his attention is on me. Even now that I realize I’m about to get chewed out, at least he’s actually looking at me.

I can work with that.

“The Kings Pot Bikers are sending Leicester. Holland. He isn’t like the other street thugs we’ve crushed. He’s soft, yes, but he’s feared for a reason”.

I scoff, the egoistic flare in my chest rising like heat. Holland is a peasant I don’t see why he is even part of this conversation, it’s not like we couldn’t make his little thug company under by tomorrow if we wanted to, but it’s just too much risk and other things that might likely pop up.

Apparently it’s more than just a biker company and they’re more shady than legal.

“Holland Leicester is a relic. He deals in the dirt while we deal in the future. I’ll put him in his place before the first session even begins”. I was confident he couldn’t get in a war of words with me especially when his reputation precedes him. Pretty sure he’d be silenced by someone else.

This conference is not just any conference and that’s why my Father is about to shit his pants over some peasant like Holland. The thought of the guy makes me sick to my bones.

“See that you do,” George said, his voice dropping an octave. “And remember, This is your last chance Derek, there is always a replacement if you screw up” He said as he adjusts his form on his seat and grit rub my hand back and forth on my forehead.

“I’d rather we didn’t talk about my replacement Father. You know i-“

“But she’s better than you” He words slicing through me like a knife. “Jocelyn gets the job done without having to ask for help every step of the way!”

“That was one time!” I raise my voice.

“One time too many Derek! You’re supposed to be the heir to this Corporation, but at this point I’m not so sure”

The mention of my adoptive sister made my jaw tighten. Jocelyn was petite, curly-haired, and seemingly innocent, but I knew she had her own motives hidden behind that toned, tanned skin. She wanted my throne. And my father was more than happy to watch us bleed for it.

Joycelyn is never afraid to go to any length to get what she wants and my Father adores her for it. But it got scary at some point. She enjoyed the fact that we had to compete for anything. She enjoyed the fact that my emotions were all over the place whenever she was around.