Lying in the dark, watching the reflections of the water on my ceiling, I’m still numb with a sensation as though I’m floating on the ocean directly, but I’m still lying on my bed. It’s night and dark; I haven’t left, and I don’t want to.

I’ve cried so much that my body is ravaged and weak. I didn’t know it could do this to me, releasing so much doubt, insecurity, and pain. I haven’t sobbed properly since I was five years old. Back then, I didn’t cry over heartache; ...