I stand in the shower for an unbelievably long time. The hot water pouring down me refreshingly helps to push the nausea down. I’m aching at everything so familiar about being here, so many memories and thoughts of Jake beside me. I feel like I’ve woken inside a dream, some strange alternate reality I never left, and this feels like where I should be. It’s disconcerting and doesn’t help my emotionally confused state of mind at all.

Fully cleansed of my shameful drunken night ...