The Camilla of the streets would have romanced him and blown him by now if he was of any value to me in this life, but as I have my eye on a much bigger and sexier prize, then I am wasting none of my hard-earned flattery on the likes of pencil dick and his complete hatred of women having an equal footing to him.

I have been here for almost two months since I got out of the hospital, and much to my complete disappointment, our suave Italian has never reappeared in all that time to give ...