His hands have lost the urgency, and even though he holds me down again, it’s with less force or intent, and his grip stays loose and gentle so that I can pull my limbs free if I want to. His movements and thrusts are slower and more precise; his whole demeanour has changed subtly, but enough that instead of feeling like I am being attacked and screwed by a madman, I feel like this is consensual sex, and he is trying not to hurt me anymore.

Alexi brings me to a fever pitch over what ...