My mood is brighter and more serene now, and I am feeling optimistic about this, even if in my depths, the swirling sense of pride and stubbornness is battling with me like an infernal tornado.

I try to ignore the warning bells, pangs of fear and push the anxiety aside. I can always leave if this goes pear-shaped, maybe be better prepared for life back out there, and have backup plans ready if I need to go this time. This doesn’t need to be forever, and I should look at it as a ...