I yelp in alarm, head torn from thoughts of the cat, when I catapult backwards as my backrest caves in with someone opening the door behind me. I land flat on my spine with an ungraceful thud, my head in the gloomy hall of the club, facing up at the smug-looking prick that opened it.

Alexi stands over me, gazing down, obviously amused with this little manoeuvre and fully aware of what he was doing with a smart-arse smile on that clean-cut face. There’s a camera pointing down on the ...