‘I’m not going to hurt you. I swear. I have no motives this time, and I’m not doing anything to try to fuck with you. You have to believe me, Cam.’ Alexi sounds strained, his voice low and almost emotional, but I’m too exhausted. I can’t take him at face value.

‘Yes, you will. It’s what you do; it’s what you always do. It’s what you can’t help yourself from doing to me at every opportunity you get.’ I keep slapping away the hands he tries to lay on me, hysteria ...