After everything we have gone through, lies and games, manipulation and misunderstandings. It would ruin us if I used this to get what I wanted. I don’t want to harm what we have growing between us. I want to be trusted and to trust him. I can’t ask him never to betray me and then do precisely that.

Isn’t that what we are trying to learn to do? Isn’t that why he is trying to show me he can be someone else for me?

It’s there though. In my brain swirling around, I wonder ...