“Why do you sound so surprised?” I give her an irritable look. “Just because I look like a monster doesn’t mean—”

I don’t get to finish the sentence because I’m slapped upside my head. “Excuse you? You’re the only one who thinks you look like a monster. Don’t bunch me into your idiot category.”

I rub my head where she smacked me, wincing. “Why are you so strong? And stop hitting me. You’re a married woman. If you want to beat someone, you’ve got a husband for ...