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The Art of Groveling

Mason cornered me three days later while I was hanging laundry behind the cottage, an embarrassingly domestic scene that definitely wasn't how I'd imagined my first real conversation with my ex-mate would go.

"Maggie," he said, approaching carefully like I might bolt at any sudden movements. "We need to talk."

I continued pinning one of Aurora's impossibly tiny onesies to the clothesline, pretending his presence didn't make my stomach clench with old, complicated emotions. "We're talking now. You're talking, I'm hanging laundry. Very efficient."

"I mean really talk. About us. About what happened. About... about whether there's any chance you'd consider coming back."

I dropped the clothespin.

Not magically, not because my powers were acting up from emotional stress, but because I was so shocked I literally forgot how to hold small objects. The pin bounced off my foot and rolled under the cottage steps while I stared at Mason like he'd grown a second head.

"Coming back?" I repeated slowly. "To the pack that cast me out while I was pregnant? To you? The man who publicly rejected me in front of everyone I thought cared about me?"

Mason had the good grace to look ashamed, running a hand through his golden hair in that gesture I'd once found endearing and now just found annoying. "I know how it sounds—"

"It sounds like you've lost your mind."

"Maybe I have!" he said, the words tumbling out in a rush. "Maybe I've been slowly losing my mind ever since I watched you walk away from everything we built together. Maybe I've been lying awake every night wondering what our life would have looked like if I'd been strong enough to stand up to the Council, to Chizzy, to my own damn fears."

I bent to retrieve the fallen clothespin, mostly to avoid looking at his face. Mason in emotional distress was like a kicked puppy pathetic and appealing in ways that bypassed rational thought.

"You made your choice," I said to the laundry basket.

"I made the wrong choice. The stupidest, most cowardly choice possible, and I've regretted it every single day since."

"And now you want me to just... what? Forgive and forget? Pack up my new life and come running back because you've finally figured out you made a mistake?"

"Yes," he said simply. "That's exactly what I want."

I straightened up so fast I nearly gave myself whiplash. "Are you completely insane?"

"Probably. Look, I know how this looks. I know the timing is awful and I have no right to ask, but Maggie..." He stepped closer, and I could smell the familiar scent of his aftershave mixed with leather and something uniquely Mason. "I love you. I never stopped loving you. Not for a single moment."

"Oh, well, why didn't you say so?" I said sarcastically, waving a damp baby shirt in his direction. "Love fixes everything, doesn't it? Love makes up for betrayal and abandonment and letting your chizzy frame me for poisoning you."

"I know love doesn't fix….."

"Love doesn't make up for the fact that I nearly died alone in the woods while carrying a child you should have protected. Love doesn't erase the fact that you chose your political position over your mate's life."

Mason flinched like I'd slapped him, but he didn't back down. "You're right. You're absolutely right, and I don't expect forgiveness. I just... I had to try. I had to ask if there was any part of you that might still..."

He trailed off, looking so miserable that I almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

"Still what, Mason?"

"Still care enough to give me another chance."

Before I could answer, Aurora's delighted laughter drifted from the cottage where Maverick was watching her while I did laundry. The sound was pure joy, the kind of happiness that comes from being completely secure in your place in the world.

"Do you hear that?" I asked Mason.

"What?"

"That's what contentment sounds like. That's the sound of a baby who's never doubted, not for a single second, that she's wanted and loved and protected by both her parents." I turned to face him fully, letting him see everything in my expression. "That's what I never had with you, Mason. Security. The absolute certainty that you'd choose me, choose us, no matter what."

"But I'm choosing you now—"

"Now, when it's convenient. Now, when you've seen what I've become, what I've built without you. Where was this grand romantic gesture when I was bleeding in the forest? Where was this undying love when Chizzy was handing me poisoned wine?"

Mason's shoulders sagged. "I was scared. I was weak and I was scared, and I let that fear make me into someone I hate."

"And you think that's supposed to make me feel better? That my mate abandoned me because he was scared?"

"No, I think it makes me human," he said quietly. "Deeply, shamefully human in all the worst ways. But people can change, Maggie. People can grow."

From inside the cottage came the sound of Maverick's deep laughter mixing with Aurora's giggles, followed by what sounded like someone playing peek-a-boo with great enthusiasm. My heart did that little flutter it always did when I heard them together—my mate and my daughter, building their own private world of inside jokes and shared affection.

"Maybe people can change," I agreed. "But some betrayals cut too deep to heal."

"So that's it? You won't even consider—"

"Mason." I put down the laundry basket and looked at him with as much kindness as I could manage. "I'm going to tell you something, and I need you to really hear it, okay?"

He nodded eagerly, hope flickering in his blue eyes.

"I'm happy. Genuinely, completely, ridiculously happy. Happier than I ever was with you, even in the beginning when I thought you hung the moon." I gestured toward the cottage where my family was. "I have a mate who chose me over everything else, including his own safety. I have a daughter who will never doubt that she's the center of our world. I have a life that's messy and complicated and sometimes terrifying, but it's mine."

"But we could have that too—"

"No, we couldn't. Because you'd always be the man who abandoned me when things got difficult, and I'd always be the woman who couldn't trust you completely. That's not a foundation for happiness, Mason. That's a recipe for resentment and second-guessing and midnight arguments about things that happened years ago."

The hope in his eyes was dimming, replaced by the kind of resignation that comes with finally understanding an unwelcome truth.

"Besides," I added more gently, "what we had... it was beautiful for what it was. First love, young passion, the dream of building something together. But it was also built on me being smaller than I really am, quieter than I needed to be, more willing to follow than to lead."

"I loved who you were—"

"I know. But who I was then was only a fraction of who I am now. You loved Luna Maggie, the perfect mate who smiled and nodded and never challenged your decisions. But I'm not her anymore, Mason. I'm a mother and a leader and someone who's learned that love isn't about being cherished and protected—it's about being seen and chosen and supported as an equal partner."

Mason was quiet for a long moment, his gaze fixed on the cottage where Maverick's voice could be heard singing what sounded like a completely made-up lullaby about brave little wolves who ate their vegetables.

"He really loves you," Mason said finally.

"He really does. And more importantly, he likes me. The real me, not some idealized version he's carrying around in his head."

"And you love him."

It wasn't a question, but I answered anyway. "Desperately. Completely. In ways I didn't even know were possible."

Mason nodded slowly, the last of his hope finally extinguished. "I suppose I knew that already. I just... I had to try."

"I know. And I'm not angry that you asked. Confused, maybe. A little concerned about your judgment. But not angry."

"Can I..." He hesitated, then forged ahead. "Can I ask you something? About forgiveness?"

"What about it?"

"Do you think you'll ever be able to forgive me? Not for her sake," he added quickly, nodding toward the cottage, "or because we need to work together for the sanctuary. But for your own peace of mind?"

I considered the question while hanging up another tiny shirt. Forgiveness was complicated. It didn't mean forgetting or excusing or pretending damage hadn't been done. But it might mean letting go of the anger that served no purpose except to poison my own happiness.

"I think," I said carefully, "that I might already be starting to. Not because you deserve it, but because carrying around all that hurt and rage is exhausting."

"Thank you," he said quietly. "That's more than I have any right to expect."

"Mason?" I called as he turned to leave.

"Yeah?"

"For what it's worth, I do think you can change. I think you can become the kind of man who doesn't let fear make his decisions for him. But you have to do that work for yourself, not because you're hoping it will win me back."

He smiled—the first genuine smile I'd seen from him since his arrival. "I'll try to remember that."

After he left, I finished hanging the laundry in peaceful silence, listening to the sounds of my family's laughter drifting from the cottage. When Maverick appeared in the doorway with Aurora on his hip, both of them slightly rumpled from their game of peek-a-boo, I felt that familiar flutter of contentment.

"Everything okay?" he asked, his eyes scanning my face for signs of distress.

"Everything's perfect," I said, meaning it completely.

And it was. Messy and complicated and sometimes involving way too much baby laundry, but absolutely perfect.

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