Maria

Even with the bowl of hangover soup and pain meds, I was still having a migraine, the headache crawling to my eyes, making it hard for me to keep them open.

Thankfully, around mid noon I was able to leave my room and freshen up. Christmas was in three days, and I needed to get gifts for my parents. They deserved to have everything on their Christmas wish list ticked. It was the least I could do for all the times they spent their little salary making sure I and my sister met a gift under the Christmas tree every year.

The Reed Brothers also tagged along. They came with a list of their own as well. It was a big relief Cade didn't come with them. I would die of embarrassment, not when I puked on his face and all over his car seat yesterday. This happened seconds after he asked me the absurd question if I was jealous.

That wasn't the answer I expected to give him. But it would do. I was certain that whenever he rode his precious Benz, he would remember how I ruined the leather with my puke.

As we passed the Christmas tree store. I decided to buy a new tree to replace the old one at home. Mom would be pleased at the upgrade since the old one was already almost ten years old and begging to be changed.

Later that evening. The Reed brothers came to help install the tree. Cade came as well. While I wrapped the gifts up, he sat beside me filled with complaints.

“You know it took me hours to wipe your puke off my car seat. I doubt if the smell will ever come off.”

I remained silent, doing the final touch-ups on Mom's present. “What, you want an apology for your precious car?” I asked in a tone dripping with sarcasm.

It was obvious what Cade wanted wasn't an apology. What he really wanted was for me to accept that I got jealous last night seeing him in the arms of another woman, which wasn't going to happen.

To repay the Reed Brothers for helping out in setting up the Christmas tree. Dad turned on the Volleyball Match, several bottles of beer lined on the table as they went at each other in a heated argument on whose team was going to win.

Still a bit hungover. I excused myself to my room. I took a quick shower and was in the process of getting dressed into my PJs when I noticed Cade staring at me through my open door, which I must have left open, thinking I locked it on my way in. His hand hovered above the door handle, a look of innocence and something else. Something intense, sexually enticing, clouding his face.

“What the hell, Cade!” I howled, covering my heaving chest with my hand.

He explained, stuttering with every word. “The door was opened. I… I didn't mean to.”

Aiden howled his name from downstairs. Their team was winning. Cade didn't pay me a second glance, apologizing profusely again before leaving.

A part of me wasn't offended at all that he caught me half naked. In fact, I was overjoyed with the way he reacted to me. Now, he knew up close that I was a grown woman. Ten times sexier than the brunette he had with him last night.

From my window, I watched the Reed brothers enter their house. It was an evening well spent with my father over a couple of beers. I could tell they were fully into the holiday spirit as Liam nudged Aiden, the two laughing at Cade.

I sat on my window plane for a minute or two watching the sprinkle of Christmas lights scattered around the city. Everyone had caught on to the holiday fever. Everyone except me.

A message notification popped up with Cade's name appearing on my screen. “Asleep yet?” He asked.

I was in the process of responding when the lights in his bedroom came on. “Not yet. You?” I typed back, chewing on my fingernails. A habit I adopted whenever I was in a good mood.

“Want to take a walk?” He asked.

Cade and I had a lot to talk about. Feelings that needed to be well defined, unsettled beef that needed to be squabbled out. My hands hovered above my screen. Before I gave it a second thought, I responded. “Sure.”

The local playground was empty, serene, and a conducive place to hold a conversation. I sat on one of the swings, pushing myself.

Cade sat beside me, sighing into the night. “First, I wanted to apologize for earlier. I didn't mean to.” He began.

Wherever the confidence came from. I had no idea. But my tongue moved on its own volition, rendering his apology useless. “What if I wanted you to?. Not that I intentionally left the door open. But I'm glad it was.” I confessed, a faint blush burning my cheeks.

Cade stood up from the swing, towering above me. “Maria… I… I mean, you're like a sister to me. I don't see you as anything other than family.” He said, the pain of his rejection knocking the air out of my lungs.

He continued, voice dropping to a low whisper. “What happened with Jöel was my fault. As your big brother, I should have protected you, and for that I'm sorry.”

Even with the thick coat and muffler I had on. I still felt a nerve-wracking cold. The type that left me feeling numb. A chuckle of disdain shook through me as I stood up as well, fed up with my unrequited feelings that would never be reciprocated.

“Sorry?” I mouthed his words back, digging my nails into the folds of my palms. “Out of everything you've said tonight. You were right about one thing. Jöel. I waited, Cade… I waited for you to see me as more than that little girl who needs protecting. But you never did. Joel was everything you weren't. He made me feel seen… appreciated.”

Cade made to defend himself. I shut him up with the wave of my hand. “But no more. I'm done hanging around, hoping that one day you'll start to see me as more than family. I’M DONE.” I declared, making sure it sank right in.

“Maria.” He tried to touch my hand.

I moved away before he did, staring at him with the eyes of a stranger. Someone who meant nothing to me but an opposite neighbor.

It was a hard decision to make, but necessary that I make peace with the fact that Cade Reed would never love me the way I wanted him to.

The only thing left for me to do was to move on and put an end to my years of unrequited love.