"It doesn't fit."

"It fits."

"No, it doesn't."

"Yes, it does."

"Hey, I like tight dresses probably more than most men, but-how should I put this?-you're falling out of it, and you're zipped only about halfway in back."

"It fits," I say through clenched teeth.

"If you don't want an honest opinion, why did you invite me to your room to see it on you?"

"I didn't invite you in," I remind him. "You invited yourself. But I don't need you ...