"There's no way I'm naked and handcuffed in Mexico," I say, despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

"I can't believe you're naked, either," Hank says. "I thought it would take a lot longer to get your clothes off."

He turns his head, scans my body, and lets out a slow whistle.

"Really? Really? You're starting that now?" I shout and sucker punch him with my free hand, right in the gut. I make impact with a satisfying grunt. He bolts upright and ...