Jarrod is stretched back on the sofa. "I've not had a decent curry in, I don't know how long."

I grin in response, as I try to work out how to start the conversation that could destroy our friendship.

"Missing the misses yet?" he asks, and I'm nodding before I can stop myself. My eyes barely leave the TV; I don't want him to know just how right he is. I pretend to watch as one of the players tries to score a goal.

"It's complete b*llocks." I frown as I turn to face him. ...