"No way. I don't interview waitresses."

My colleague, Craig, jogs to catch up with me as I march down the carpeted hallway between offices. "Please. I've got a staffing issue tonight I've got to deal with. Just ask the girl a few questions, make sure she's got a nice ass and send her off to HR to do paperwork."

"No."

"God, you are such an asshole," he laughs, but there's frustration beneath the sound.

So be it. I'm not here to make friends. In fact, in my position as a pit boss on the ...