“That’s a good one,” he says. He’s lying. Or probably is. Or at least, he should be. That was terrible. About as funny as a Jehovah’s Witness. Actually, no. Those guys can be really funny. Especially if you invite them in and try to convert them to Wicca. I keep the books near my door just in case. It really freaks them out.

“And how about Johnny there?”

“I can’t respect a man who calls himself Johnny,” I say, “Unless his last name is ...