Chandler

I close my front door and walk to my favorite chair.

My phone rings.

I ignore it.

Instead, I stare, with my good eye, at the bag of peas on the floor.

What the h*ll just happen?

I am a b*tch right now.

No, loyalty is a b*tch.

My phone rings again.

Now my landline rings.

I place my hands on the top of my head. D*mn, my head hurts right now.

My eye is killing me.

F*ck.

How did I not see the d*mn ...