I woke up in the morning. I am not tired, but my body was.

I opened the small window in my room to get some fresh air.

I went to the kitchen to make coffee for myself. Coffee saves me in this cold and warm fall. Leaves have started to fall, people started to wear sweaters, and pumpkin spice latte has just started to be served.

This is my favorite season of all.

I am going to enjoy this fall before winter comes and does its Christmas magic.

I got ready for the therapy. For today, I had a simple look. I had a simple t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers on. I had my hair down straight.

I was so nervous about this first meeting that I almost forgot to eat my lunch. My grandma had reminded me.

“Sunshine, where are you going?”

“Good morning grandma. You know what day it is.”

“I know. Don’t forget your grandma is getting old and she is forgetting things. You are still young and growing. DON’T FORGET YOUR BREAKFAST.” My grandma literally scolded me.

“I am going to, I wanted to test you if you could catch me”

“I can forget about anything, sunshine but not you.” She always knows how to make me feel guilty.

“Alright, I will have breakfast. Don’t make sad faces”

I had a quick lunch to make my grandma happy and I went to therapy.

I entered a building on Street 52 and went up to the 5th floor to meet my therapist.

I entered the room and I saw a woman in red who had glasses on. She was sitting on a coach that seemed to be comfortable. Soft music was playing in the background. Stick animals were displayed near the window. The entire room was in a light color. In this room, the therapist seemed to be the brightest shining object in this room.

She seemed sophisticated and a highly educated person. She warmly welcomed me in. She introduced me and gave me consent papers. She said she has emailed my parents the consent paper and they have given the consent for me to talk about anything in this session.

“I don’t know where to start-”

“Tell me why you are here?” she asked me.

“Well, my parents wanted me to go through therapy. My parents are not together, but my mother believed that their separation has done something to me. She asked my dad if I could go to therapy. At first, he hesitated but he eventually said “yes.” So here I am.”

“What is your relationship with your parents?

“I do not have the best relationship with them. They are separated and I am staying with my mom and my grandma.” I don’t know how to answer this question. I kept it simple.

“Tell me more.”

“There is nothing else to say”

“How is your relationship with your grandma?”

“I love her. Right now she is the only good thing in my life. She takes care of me when my mom is sobering about leaving my dad even though he brutally treated her all the time. My grandma gives me hope and encourages me to try different things.” I felt safe sharing about my grandma. At the same time, I blurted out about my parents' relationships.

She nodded her head as she agreed with me. “So, your grandma is the light in your life.”

“Yeah…” I replied with uncertainty about where this conversation was going.

“How much do you love your grandma?” She asked.

“I love her more than myself.”

“Do you think you are relying too much on your grandma?”

“No, I love her as any granddaughter would.”

“Alright, is there anything specific that you want to talk about since we still have a few more minutes?”

“Not specifically. I just wish my dad treated my mom better than he did.”

“Like how?”

“ Love her no matter what. Respected her. Protected her. Most importantly, he should have respected her love for him. He cheated on my mother twice and she is going through pain. And I can’t see her in such pain.”

“Tell me how you are feeling about all of these circumstances.”

“I feel lonely and devastated to know that I will never see my parents together. My dad is in a different house with his lover. My mom is depressed. I moved to this new city and I have no new friends. I am lonely and exhausted. I do not have anyone to protect me. And I am only 17.” Tears started to fall down my eyes.

“Radha, I see that you went through so much. Today, is your second day right? You still have so much time to make new friends.” When she said that I could only think of Krishna. His presence in my thoughts is very strong. I could not think of anyone. We only talked for 2 minutes and he lives rent-free in my mind for 2 days.

“Well, there is this guy who I met yesterday. His name is Krishna and my class president. I could only think of him when I think of friends. I have a weird feeling about him which I never felt before.”

“Ok. seems like you have something to talk about in our next session.”

“I will see you in our next session if I can make it,” I said and left the session.

Thank god I am done. I do not like therapy…